What Can Happen in a Year and a Half?

A lot.

I'll try to make this short...

Let's see. The end of 2009 was fine. I struggled eating healthy and exercise due to the holidays but overall everything was good.

Then on January 1st, 2010, my world changed. Joe and I had spent New Year's Eve in Lexington with some college friends and then went to Louisville New Year's Day to visit some old work friends. At 5 am on the 2nd my phone rings. It's Dad. Mom is in the hospital. They don't know what is wrong but she is stable for now. Joe and I immediately went home, where we found out she had collapsed due to chest pain in a coffee shop the night before. She was in CCU but awake and aware. Chatting and even making jokes. The doctors eventually went in to look at her heart (I can't remember the procedure name right now). When they were done they took us into a little room, which is never a good sign, and told us she had suffered an aortic aneurysm that dissected. Basically the main artery in heart heart was split open and she was bleeding internally. The doctors in Owensboro said her only chance was to fly to Louisville and be operated on there.

Off to Louisville, we went. The surgery started about 9 pm and lasted almost 9 hours. It was the longest night of my life. She made it through. We later found out that we were very lucky. Most doctors would not have even operated on her since there was a less than 5% chance she would have survived. But she did and we were very very thankful.

I spent the next several weeks in Louisville while Mom slowly recovered. It was a good week before I even saw her conscious. There were several scary moments during her recovery but after almost 3 weeks she was ready to go home. However, she really wasn't. We got her home and she was so over medicated that her heart rate was in the 30's. Back into the hospital she went for another week so they could regulate her meds. After she was released, I became her nurse. Staying with her night and day.

Finally in late March she was doing well enough to be left alone for short periods. Unfortunately, on March 28th while she was alone, she fell on her face on a tile floor. I don't believe I have ever shared this on here but my mom was in a horrible car wreck when she was 21. It basically shattered every bone in her face below her eye brows. It is a wonder she survived that. My mom was a fighter. Anyway, back to the hospital mom went. This fall caused bleeding on her brain and dislodged her iris in her left eye. Thankfully the bleeding stopped and no surgery was required. After this I returned to my new position as Mom's nurse.

A few minor things happened after the fall, like Mom getting a pace maker in early October but overall she was recovering quite nicely. Slowly getting her strength back, going to her swim class, even driving on her own. She had lost almost 40 lbs and looked great. I however, did not, due to the massive amount of stress eating I had done all year. By late October, I had gone back to work and Mom was completely on her own.

On November 6th, Dad and Mom traveled to Louisville to attend the Breeder's Cup. Dad dropped Mom off out front and went to park the car. Somehow while Mom was walking the short distance to the gate, she fell. We are still unsure if she tripped or passed out. She hit the same spot of her face she hit in March. Thankfully there was an ambulance nearby and she was rushed to the hospital. They ran some tests, didn't see any bleeding on her brain but wanted to keep her over night for observation. At this point, as anyone can imagine, Mom was quite sick of being in the hospital. She basically told the doctor she was going home whether he released her or not. They ended up sending her home with a prescription for Lovenox, a blood thinner, to combat the Vitamin K they had given her. She had atrial fibrillation so she needed to be on blood thinners to prevent clots. That Monday, I stayed home with her and took her to the doctor. That night Joe and I went by to visit. She was a little beat up but seemed fine.

Tuesday, November 9th, at around 4:30 am Dad calls. Mom had thrown up a few times and was becoming unresponsive. I knew what that meant. I yelled at Dad to call the ambulance and I rushed over. When I got there, the medics were loading her on the stretcher. She wasn't there. At the hospital, the doctors confirmed what I already knew. Her brain was bleeding and there was nothing they could do. Her blood was too thin. She passed a few hours later.

Life since that day has been different. I went from seeing or at least talking to Mom every day for 10 months, to nothing. Part of me is thankful for the months I spent as her nurse. That is time we would not have had if she hadn't gotten sick but another part of me wishes we could have spared her all the pain she went through during those 10 months. Joe and I have stepped up to take care of Dad when needed. John is busy with the boys (Yes boys. I have a new nephew that just turned 1!) and Dad does not have many friends of his own. Thankfully he and Joe seem to get along really well now that we are married and not just living together. Joe has also been wonderful at taking care of me. I could not ask for a better husband. I know I will never be ok with Mom passing but I do have to accept it and go on.

Yeah. That wasn't short and that isn't even everything. I have not even touched on my three miscarriages but that's another post.